7 SEO Idiots (I Mean ‘Experts’) to Avoid

Some of the SEO “experts” we encounter exhibit less than tasteful attributes. Having been inspired by The Oatmeal, I’ve taken the liberty of illustrating some of the bad SEO professionals.

I understand that I might be slightly hypocritical in this post. I’ve found myself displaying some of the characteristics below.

Big Words/Acronyms SEO

You may have caught yourself using jargon that might be over your clients’ heads. These SEO Experts may know the trade, they just lack the ability to communicate effectively with clients. If you notice that your client has a blank look, you may want to ask if they don’t understand something you’re saying.

Your CMS is really bad for SEO. In fact I don't see a robots.txt or an XML sitemap. I recommend a mod_rewrite for your non-www version and use of the canonical tag. Your keyword density looks spammed and you have no ALT tag descriptions. No wonder you aren’t at the top of the SERPs.

Sparkling, White Hat SEO

Don’t get me wrong, white hat is the way to go in SEO. However, some incompetent SEOs may claim that their lack of linkbuilding is due to high moral principles. They put on a facade of “White Hat.” These SEOs either don’t get linkbuilding or they don’t want to put forth the effort to do it. Of course there are plenty of gray/black hat ways of building links. But other linkbuilding methods such as submitting a press release, creating quality linkbait, etc. are legitimate and great for SEO.

Just give me a few years and I'll get your website to the top. I'm completely white, sparkly hat. My SEO campaigns are based on moral principles. Link building is just not for me and my possy. If you have to work for links, then you're crossing the integrity line. Most of what I do is on-page... actually all I do is on-page optimization. But hey, I'm really gooood at it.

Conversion Expert Turned SEO

The Conversion Expert SEO is more uncommon. These SEOs somehow mistakenly believe that user experience is intricately connected with SEO. They carry the label of “Internet Marketer” but they only talk about conversion and design. The idea of increasing traffic rarely crosses their minds

Search marketing is a lot about user experience. So you've got 10 visitors a month? With my SEO experience, I'll boost your conversion rate by 10%. I'm sure we can convert at least one of them.

Self-Proclaimed Social Media Expert

The Social Media Expert may have been an SEO who was drawn into the hype of Social Media. He tells the world that he is a Social Media Expert because he knows how to use Facebook and Twitter. He frequently talks about “going viral,” although he has no idea how to go viral. And sadly, he measures his effectiveness based on the number of followers and friends he acquires.

We HAVE to get an account with every social network... I've already signed you up for SocialBunny, Diggggg.com, and Wuphf.com. If you get lots of accounts you'll get lots of links. Oh yeah, you're going to want a lot of followers and friends... it will definitely help your SEO.

IT Guy

SEO is an IT thing right? Wrong. Unfortunately, the in-house IT guy thinks that SEO belongs to the IT department since it involves algorithms and coding. While SEO may require someone with a bit of HTML skills, it should belong to the marketing department and more specifically a “Search Team.”

Well, I just googled SEO and I found out that keyword density is REALLY important. I’m just going to be adding our keyword, 'Organic Kitty Chow,' all over our website and in the keywords meta tag. We don’t need an SEO firm -- SEO is an IT thing. I’ll take care of it.

Bad Grammar Offshore SEO

We get plenty of emails and comments filled with poor translation grammar. Do you really want someone who’s using a translation tool to do your keyword research? These SEOs may be cheap but not very effective.

I has like blogging, and I always comment on other blogs to get links. I says things like 'Your write good posts, I am bookmarking this blog for return.' These kinds comments always get approval. SEO is really a lot as surgery. I has got thousands of comment links with my softwares. Please make business with me.

Black Hat SEO

The Black Hat SEO should be avoided like the plague. He may get you fast results, but those results will quickly decline after Google notices the spammy tactics around your website. Black Hat SEOs will always take the easy way out and often do more damage than good.

Give me your business and I'll get you to the top tomorrow. I've got plenty of doorway pages and I spin just about every article out there. Who needs to actually write unique content anymore? Don't worry about my techniques, they always work. I've only had a few hundred websites banned.

Any more ideas?

Do you agree? What other SEO “Experts” should you avoid? Share your ideas in a comment.


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October 5, 2010  Tags: , , ,   Posted in: SEO / Traffic / Marketing

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